Julian cooked dinner that evening, and for the first time in weeks the house felt as though it was pretending to be peaceful. He moved around the kitchen with a kind of forced ease. Not relaxed, not cheerful, but measured, as if he were performing the memory of domestic comfort instead of living it. He wiped the same section of counter twice, stepped back to inspect it, then nodded like someone who needed to reassure himself that everything looked normal.
He had even set the table with the plates we kept for guests instead of the mismatched everyday set. He filled a small glass halfway with orange juice and slid it toward Evan with a stretched grin.
“Look at Dad, trying out his star chef routine,” Evan joked, laughing as he hopped into his chair.
I returned the smile he expected, although my stomach had been tight for days. Something had shifted in Julian recently. He had not grown more affectionate or more distant, simply more controlled. Every expression he wore felt tested before it ever reached his face.
The meal looked harmless. Baked chicken with herbs, soft steamed vegetables, and rice that smelled faintly of garlic. Nothing suspicious on the surface. Yet when Julian sat down, he barely touched his own food. He kept glancing at his phone, the screen facing down beside his plate as though hiding its light would hide the reason he kept waiting for it to buzz.
Halfway through chewing a bite of chicken, I felt my tongue grow heavy. It was subtle at first, like the numbness that comes from biting it accidentally. Then the heaviness spread toward the back of my throat.
Evan blinked at me, his eyes glassy. “Mom, I feel weird. I am really tired.”
Julian reached across the table and rested his hand on our son’s shoulder with a slow softness that made my skin crawl. “It is okay. Just breathe and let your body rest.”
A spike of panic pierced through the fog creeping into my mind. I tried to stand, but the room tilted like the floor had shifted underneath me. My knees buckled. The chair scraped backward as I grabbed the edge of the table, yet my fingers felt coated in rubber. The world became fuzzy at the edges, dissolving into darkness I had to fight with everything left in me.