My mother was so infuriated by these words that after Samantha left, she furiously pounded on my back, saying, "You're such a loss, if not for you, I wouldn't be looked down upon. Why don't you just die?"
Her blows almost caused me internal injuries, but it was nothing compared to the heartache of realizing I honestly wasn't loved.
That night, my mother was so upset that she went into premature labor and had a son.
My nightmare began then.
4
When my brother was born, my parents cherished him like the apple of their eye, even forbidding me from touching him.
"Keep your dirty hands away, what if you hurt him with your rough hands?" I brought chicken soup to my mother resting in bed and couldn't resist pulling back a corner of the swaddle to peek at this little person who replaced my role as the beloved child. But my mother slapped my hand away.
My family had longed for a son for many years, and finally, filling that void lifted their spirits to the skies.
My father took a swig of liquor, looked approvingly at my mother sprawled on the bed, and chirped, "You finally gave me a son; now I have a descendant."
His gaze was intensely fixed on my mother and the newborn, a look of tenderness and anticipation I had never seen before as if he finally had a home. A warm home with a wife and son.
I bowed my head and silently stepped out, looking up at the dark blue night sky while secretly wiping away tears.
Thinking of Amber, whose whereabouts were unknown, I quickly dried my tears.
Without the love of my father or mother, I must keep living well until the day I find Amber, for only then will we indeed be family to each other.
There was a free school in the village, but I had no chance to attend; I needed to work at home.
As my two aunts sent their sons off, they came specially to mock us when they noticed our house was still. "Nora, why isn't Angela in school? It's such a great opportunity that doesn't cost a dime."
My mother just smiled, "I just had a baby, there's no one else to do the chores around here; Angela needs to stay and help me."
Samantha sneered half-heartedly, "Oh please, everyone knows you traded your daughter for your son. What was it you said? A son and a daughter are the same; they're both your kids."
Melinda Lewis, my second uncle's wife, chimed in from the side. "Yeah, Nora, if they're all your kids, then selling Amber shouldn't mean Angela has to suffer."