And what ten years had earned me was his buddies calling Rosalie "wifey" while they teased them together. It was the way he'd looked away from me when I stood outside that booth. It was him laughing and playing around with her at the bar while I walked out carrying a cup of tea that had gone cold.
I typed. My hands were steady.
"Valentine, in ten years, what did you ever give me?"
Send. Block the number.
The bus came. I got on and sat in the last row, by the window.
The rain picked up, streaking down the glass in long, uneven lines.
I watched the city outside. Neon signs bled together into a smear of red and green and yellow, all of it running, running downward.
My phone was quiet.
I looked down and saw the post I'd just shared. A few people had liked it.
I tapped. A coworker. A college classmate. A couple of casual friends.
Not Valentine.
He never showed up on my feed.
But every single thing he posted, I'd liked.
I leaned against the window and closed my eyes.
One thought kept circling through my head.
He'd said she was just like a sister.
But in ten years, he had never once called me his girlfriend.
The rain came down harder.
The window was covered in water now, and the world outside dissolved into nothing, red and green lights all bleeding downward.
I pressed my forehead against the glass. The cold seeped in, and my temples throbbed.
Another text. Another new number.
"Are you coming back or not?"
I stared at those five words.
No "home." No "us." No "I'll wait for you."
Just are you coming back or not.
Like I'd asked him what he wanted for dinner. Like I'd just stepped out to grab something from the store. Like I was throwing some little tantrum and once the rain stopped, I'd slink back on my own.
I typed one word: "No."
Send. Block.
The bus lurched. My stop. I stepped off, and the rain hit me full in the face, drenching. I didn't run. I just walked.
I walked past the barbecue place we always used to go to. The owner was closing up for the night. She spotted me and paused. "Hey, sweetie, all by yourself tonight? Where's that man of yours?"
I gave her a smile and kept walking.