"Back then, you said you'd never replace this couch, no matter how much money you made."
"You said it was proof that we loved each other."
Julian's gaze flickered. He couldn't look at me.
I picked up the remote from the coffee table. A strip of tape was wound around its middle, from the time Julian had gotten drunk and dropped it. I hadn't wanted to replace it, so I'd just wrapped it in tape.
I ran my thumb over the ridged edge of the tape.
"But the truth is, things stay and people change. Isn't that right?"
"No!" Julian rushed toward me. "That's not how it is!"
His eyes were already rimming red, the same way they always did whenever he got worked up.
"Lucille and I were an accident!"
"I don't love her!"
"I swear!"
He dropped to one knee in front of me and reached for my hand. I shifted away. I watched the flash of hurt cross his face, and then he kept going.
"That night at the dinner, I'd had too much to drink. I don't even know how Lucille ended up at the hotel. When I woke up, I was terrified. I'm not lying to you!"
Tears spilled down his cheeks.
"I was afraid that if you found out, you'd leave me, that you'd be furious. I didn't know how to face you!"
"So I just—"
"How long?"
"What?"
"How long." My voice stayed flat. "You and Lucille. How long has it been going on?"
Julian went silent. He held my gaze for a long time before the words scraped out of him.
"Three and a half years."
I thought about how Julian used to say he'd come back to stay for a few days every year.
But eventually, he never had the time.
It turned out it wasn't that he didn't have the time.
He'd simply spent all of it on someone else.
A dull ache spread through my chest. Then Julian started explaining again.
"I wanted to end it, but Lucille kept clinging to me. She kept telling me about her family, how they were poor, how her parents favored sons over daughters. I just felt sorry for her..."
His voice grew weaker with every word, until even he didn't have the nerve to finish the sentence.
"Lucille."
"Is pregnant."
It was like a clap of thunder detonating right beside my ear.
I clenched my fists until my knuckles ached. Even though I'd already learned the full truth before coming here, hearing it spoken aloud still sent ice flooding through every vein.
While I'd been dreaming about our wedding, counting down the days—