They brought me to where my parents were being held and forced me to choose one of them.
The ringleader looked like he'd swallowed something rotten. His eyes were wild, manic, brimming with a sick thrill.
"No... please, no. What do you want? Money? I have money. I'll go get it for you, as much as you want. Just let my parents go. Please."
I dropped to my knees, begging, pleading for their lives.
One of the men dragged over a crate of cash and dumped it over my head.
"Money? I've got plenty of money. What I want is their lives. You know how many of my brothers died because of them?"
"If it weren't for your precious parents, I wouldn't have spent years running and hiding like a rat."
He grabbed a fistful of hair at the back of my skull and wrenched my head up, forcing me to look at Mom and Dad. He leveled a gun at each of them. "Choose. Or they both die."
"No..."
When I refused, he put a bullet through my father's leg.
My mother stared at me with unyielding pride, not a trace of surrender in her eyes. "Sweetheart, remember what Mommy told you."
I squeezed my eyes shut, the weight of grief crushing my chest as her words came flooding back. They had prepared for this. Somehow, they had always known a day like this might come.
She had told me once: if anything ever happened to both her and Dad, save him.
Not because she was blinded by love, but because she understood how much his work protecting the community mattered.
I opened my eyes again and slowly raised my hand, pointing at the woman who had given me life, who had loved me with everything she had.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This is my fault. I never should have dragged them out shopping.
But the gun still came to rest against my father's forehead.
My scream in that moment was the most useless sound in the world.
That was when I learned just how naive I'd been. They had never intended to let either of my parents go. The "choose one" game was nothing but an appetizer to them.
What they really wanted was to violate me in front of my mother.
That was when Paul arrived with the police.
"Boss, the cops are here."
The leader swore. I seized the moment and sank my teeth into him. I barely made it two steps before he aimed at me and fired. My mother broke free from the men holding her and threw herself in front of me, taking the bullet.
I've tormented myself with it ever since. If I hadn't fought back, would my mother still be alive?