But at that moment, watching him lose control in front of Ashley, I finally understood.
His so-called sense of propriety was never about self-restraint, it was about the depth of his feelings.
His restraint with me was not a mark of respect or care. It was simply that he did not love me enough.
Tears welled up in my eyes, but I wiped them away with newfound clarity.
I reached for the paper where we had once written our shared wish to be together forever.
With steady hands, I tore it apart, shredding it into countless pieces, each one a fragment of my foolish hopes.
"Darrel, I don’t love you anymore."
The words felt like a release. I let out a long sigh and turned away.
But then I was met with Darrel's gaze, which was a bit reluctant and a bit guilty.
I lowered my head in panic, not wanting to lose the last bit of my dignity in front of him.
But when I see him, the sweet memories of the past still come to my mind unconsciously.
I endured the pain like being pricked by a needle and told myself that I should not cry.
Darrel's face showed some reluctance, which actually made me imagine that I still had some weight in his heart.
He stared at the wish papers scattered on the ground and spoke slowly, “Sylvia, you also saw the wishing paper, didn’t you? I fell in love with Ashley and I couldn't just watch her marry a gay and ruin her own happiness.”
“I will get engaged to her first and then find a way to cancel the engagement later. I will still marry you. You will always be my only wife.”
Looking at his confident and condescending look, I suddenly felt relieved.
It turned out that the person I had loved for eight years was nothing more than that.
“Fine then. Let's break up, Darrel. I won't marry you.”
He did not seem to expect that the word break up would come out of my mouth and his face was full of contempt.
“You won’t marry me? You’ve been begging me to marry you for eight years. Besides, you’re almost thirty years old. If you don’t marry me, what will you do?”
His words hit me like a slap, leaving me stunned and momentarily speechless. I never imagined that Darrel, who always carried himself with such elegance, could say something so cruel.
It was then I realized, eight years together had given him ample time to learn exactly how to wound me, how to strike at my most vulnerable points.